A Good Man is Hard to Find

The title of this blog is incredibly misleading but I have a feeling it got you to click. Keep reading, there's a point.

I work for OC International, a mission organization that values its people. I know a lot of orgs say this, but in real and practical ways we care about the mental and physical well being of the people around the world that serve with us, adults and children alike. For roughly 11 years of my life I have been working with the children of our missionaries during our rest and replenish retreat in the summer called PEP.


Did I mention PEP is in the Colorado Rockies?

To understand what we do and why a good man is hard to find, let me give you a bit of incite into missionary kids (these traits are generalized and don't apply to everyone).

1. On some level, we feel responsibly for the money our parents raise. Good manners, bright smiles and God-centric answers to questions seem directly correlated to support raising. This is not true, God challenges people to obediently give, but it seems to a young MK ... the cuter you are, the bigger the bank.

2. In relation to the above trait, it's really hard to admit we are broken and not doing well. This can feel like a betrayal to our parents who have sacrificed in the service of Christ. How can you complain when God has called and your parents answered?

3. MKs are really good at relating to adults. In general, we are well-spoken, insightful, and know our place in the conversation. Unfortunately the caveat is that we are a little awkward around our peers, especially those that have never lived overseas. How does one relate with someone who thinks you live in a hut in central China when you live in a skyscraper with a concrete backyard in the heart of Beijing? This awkwardness often leads to perception of being aloof and when most of your conversations begin with, "On vacation we scuba dived in Bali" or "Every winter we visit a lodge in the Swiss Alps" one might think MKs are a bit spoiled and stuck up. That doesn't even get me started on the "one ups." In an attempt to relate, when you say, "I'm learning Spanish." I might come back at you and say, "I've been speaking Spanish since I was 5." I assure you, I'm just trying to make conversation, you are probably hearing me trying to be better than you.

4. MKs don't feel 100% comfortable anywhere. Even if you have been entirely immersed into the culture where you live, something inside reminds you that you are not actually German or Brazilian or Indonesian. Yet, you also don't belong in the culture in which your passport identifies you. It's a complicated confusion that not every one can understand.

This all leads me to the point of my title. Not just anyone can speak into the lives of MKs. In our org we like older MKs to mentor and listen to younger MKs. There is no judgement or prejudice because we "get" it. We, generally, have no shortage of mature young women that want to pour into and love the young MKs in the org. Where we lack is young men that have experience mentoring and want to spend time having fun with other MKs but also share emotions, struggles and joys with younger, boy MKs. This is a great need this summer. Coming to the retreat are a lot young men who need someone older to hang with them and speak into their lives, someone that cares for them and understands them. We have a couple young men coming to lead but where we lack is a mature, male leader for the older group, who could also lead the male staff. I am desperately seeking God's guidance in this area. Please pray with me in this. It's not an easy job but it's important and I am praying the Lord will bring the right guy to the doorstep.

So my title is not a plea of a single women looking for "Mr. Right," but it's the lament of a MK leader that needs someone to partner in the work of pouring into the lives of MKs from several countries all over the world.


(This is the staff (and one participant in the program)for the summer 2011. Notice, all young women, and don't even ask about the costumes, that story is worth another blog post.)